Older Child Adoption

Photolistings provide one of the most powerful tools available on the Internet to help with the search for an adoptable child. The benefits of photolistings are many but if you don’t understand the limits of photolistings, disappointment can also be great. This article includes information and recommendations to help photolistings work for you, as well as, links to a number of different photolistings on the web.

Children pictured in the photos may or may not be available for adoption.
Whether you are considering domestic or international adoption, it is important to understand that photolistings are representative of adoptable children but may or may not show children actually available for adoption. There are a number of reasons for this. First, many of the children pictured have already been adopted. The younger a child is and the fewer developmental problems a child has, the faster she or he will be placed for adoption. Second, children may be pictured in the listings even though they are temporarily unavailable due to emotional set backs or physical crises that need to be resolved before an adoption can be considered. Third, according to Adoption@about.com, some photolistings have begun to use models in order to preserve the privacy of the children seeking adoptive parents. Finally, there is the possibility of deceptive adoption agencies where falsified photographs and information are provided in order to reel in hopeful adoptive parents.

Profiles provided with many photolisting services are often incomplete.
Many photolistings include summaries of the strengths and weaknesses or limitations of available children. While the days of intentionally hiding details about adoptable children are substantially over in domestic adoptions, the reality is that case loads are so large that social workers often don’t know the children well enough to write an accurate profile. On the other hand, profiles will often identify the more serious disabilities present which gives you a starting point if you are either seeking the opportunity to parent a child with a certain disability or have ruled out accepting children with particular disabilities. In any case, further information is generally available upon request for children whose photos and profiles catch your attention.

Photolistings can connect you with professionals who serve available children.
While many photolistings include pictures of children who are not currently available for adoption there are thousands of children never pictured who are available and waiting for adoptive parents. Because of this, photolistings can serve an important but unexpected purpose- to connect you with social workers, charitable organizations, and private agencies that represent available children. Our three wonderful adopted children joined our family via a social worker whom I had contacted regarding a photolisting on the web. The child we contacted her about was not available at that time due to unexpected emotional setbacks but the social worker told us about a sibling group she was seeking parents for – the rest is history! While the child you called about may no longer be available, a marvelous addition to your home might come through the social worker or agency you just called. Try to be open to unplanned opportunities.

Photolistings can help you clarify your own thoughts on adoption.
If you are just beginning your search for a child, looking though photolistings can help you tackle some important issues that you need to face before proceeding. Photolistings can help you clarify your own ideas well beyond answering questions posed on a homestudy application. Some questions to think about: Would you consider a sibling group? What physical, intellectual and emotional limitations are you comfortable with? Would you be willing to extend the age range of children who are appealing to you? How open are you to children of other races and cultures?

As you browse photos and profiles, imagine the children interacting with you and your family. This may serve to expand your idea of what kind of child or children could work with your family. It also might help you honestly face your own limitations with regard to accepting certain types of children.

Recommendations
bullet Become familiar with photolistings so that you know when new children are placed on the list.
bullet If you spot a newly listed child of interest to you, contact the social worker or agency promptly.
bullet Have copies of your homestudy and accompanying papers (e.g. photo-pages of your family, introductory letter etc.) ready to send to the child’s representative.
bullet Before committing emotional and financial resources to any private agency check out the practices and past history of that agency. The Better Business Bureau keeps complaint records on private agencies. (With public agencies there is little choice available because you need to work through the local office.)
bullet Talk to other adoptive parents about agencies they have worked with and ask for their recommendations.
bullet Be honest about your limitations but be careful being so cautious that you rule out too many children. Just like having a biological child, bringing an adopted child into your family is an adventure the twists and turns of which you cannot even imagine.